How many women do you know who feel, or have felt, invisible when they reached their magic fifties. How many felt as though they were in a Harry Potter story wearing a Cloak of Invisibility?

It’s not surprising that the results of nearly every survey you read show that as many as 7 out of 10 women feel overlooked and patronised.

WHY?

Most women will say it’s because of grey hair, wearing glasses, a thickened waist and a general disillusionment with their appearance. Nobody said it would be like this!

Let’s not forget the odd forgetful moment too! Almost guaranteed to cause panic. Truthfully, I was walking into rooms trying to remember why I was there in my thirties … you’ll find few of us are exempt from that one …

At a certain time we all feel, whatever our sex, that life is geared towards the young. But it should be … they are the future and most of us are not.

Hasn’t it always been that way in every generation, probably going back to the Bronze Age? In every generation have we not looked to the young? From resolving labour issues to fighting our wars and even providing us with Joy and hope..

Apparently, low self-esteem has become almost de rigueur for we woman over 50. It’s just so wrong.

This is a link to a survey from Gransnet which I would love you to read. Eye-opening hardly begins to cover the results.

This is a list of the top 5:

□ being ignored while waiting to be served in a bar or pub or coffee shop
□ being pushed past or shoved aside in queues or crowded spaces
□ being ignored in shops
□ being ignored entering a restaurant, garage or any service business
□ BEING IGNORED

(I have included a short story of being ignored in a coffee shop several years ago … I was a mere 57 and it isn’t really a story. it’s what happened. I hope you enjoy and and if you’ve shared the experience, share your story!)

I wonder if perhaps we’ve forgotten what it’s like to be young. Being judged and assessed at a more vulnerable age and being less able to deal with unwanted attention. I think we reach a stage at which any attention is preferable to being treated as though we’re a hole in the atmosphere. There are days when I can relate to Schrodinger’s Cat and I bet you can too …

The hope is that our ‘invisibility’ could in fact lead to freedom to be ourselves without having to put up with often unwanted attention.

For me this helped me create a list of things to do and the first was and still is, I just refuse to be invisible.

This is your To Do List:

• Engage people. … chat to everyone!
• Smile: it’s very youthful.
• Stand up tall … also very youthful
• Offer the wisdom of maturity. …
• Always surround yourself with different age groups
• Learn from the young … it’s a different world now
• Recognize that appearance does matter … don’t let yourself or others think otherwise
• Never let others feel invisible …

What do you think? Do you feel less visible as you age? Is low visibility a good or a bad thing in your view?

Find the JOY in aging and being a fabulous woman over 50